THE GAUNTLET HAS BEEN THROWN DOWN

AND "GAUNTLET" is a bingo.

WON'T YOU PLEASE JOIN US on January 19th at 826NYC in Brooklyn for the upcoming

SCRABBLE FOR CHEATERS?

AT WHICH the renowned and goodhearted tutoring center/superhero supply company hosts a SCRABBLE COMPETITION featuring many teams, including one composed of:

1) ME
2) the foreigner, JOHN OLIVER

THE CHEATING PART can be explained thusly: in order to raise money for the 826NYC organization (A GOOD CAUSE), you people of the internet and beyond are asked to

BUY "CHEATS" for the team of your choice.

SUCH CHEATS include:

1. Trade out a letter—$25
2. Wheel of Fortune: buy a vowel—$50
3. Flip a letter over and make it blank—$100
4. Add 10 to any letter’s value—$150
5. Add Q, Z, or X to any word, anywhere—$200
6. Passport: play a word in any language—$250
7. Consult the dictionary for one turn—$300
8. Consult the Scrabble word list for one turn—$400
9. Reject another team’s word—$450
10. Invent a word (must have a definition)—$500

NOW, AS JACKIE MCLEOD AND KIERA KNOW, I am normally very strict about the rules of SCRABBLE.

HOWEVER I MAKE AN EXCEPTION IN THIS CASE and urge you to buy some cheats for Oliver so that he can spell words incorrectly like "HONOUR" and "COLOUR" and "GAOL" and "GIRAUFFE" and feel at home, at last.

OR ALTERNATELY, form or join your own team and START GUNNING FOR US.

SO WON'T YOU PLEASE help us cheat?

That is all.