This is John Hodgman writing via UNSOLICITED ELECTRO-MAIL regarding…
THE AREAS OF MY EXPERTISE
…a compendium of amazing true facts, historical oddities, and esoteric trivia that are almost exclusively MADE UP, by me, JOHN HODGMAN, a professional writer.
(SEE: THIS WEBSITE )
Today is 10 October, 2005 and I offer you FINEST WISHES for Canadian Thanksgiving (AKA “Doppelganger Turkey Day”), Columbus Day (AKA “Day of the Great Semi-Circumnavigator” AKA “Indigenous Peoples’ Anti-Thanksgiving”) and greet you with…
……NEWS FROM THE MAINSTREAM MEDIA…… ……A PROMISE REGARDING SKUNKS…… ……A GENTLE REMINDER…… ……THAT IS ALL……
PART ONE: NEWS FROM THE MSM
These are turbulent times, with much actual news to cover, so we are grateful and somewhat embarrassed to note this further example of “Newsweek’s” BIAS TOWARD HOBO NAMES (SEE: A PROMINENT NEWS WEEKLY )
As you know, further hobo names may be heard with music here (SEE: THIS LINK)
PART TWO: A PROMISE REGARDING SKUNKS
In re-reading my initial mailing on the subject of COMPLETE WORLD KNOWLEDGE (ol’ #1 of 20, now a collectors’ item among people who collect unsolicited electro-mails), I realized that I made a promise to send to you UNPUBLISHED PHOTOS OF CATS AND SKUNKS EATING TOGETHER.
I regret if any of you people have been waiting for this, and aim to repair the damage of my broken promise now.
Since I do not want to load up your in-box with large (large!) files of skunks-as-pets photos, I will direct you here:
(SEE: A PLACE FOR SKUNKS AND MORE )
Here you will find:
1. FIGURE 2: “AN OMINOUS PORTENT” (as published on page 34 of my book).
2. AN UNPUBLISHED PHOTO OF A SKUNK AND CAT EATING
3. AN UNPUBLISHED PHOTO OF TWO SKUNKS WHO ARE KEPT AS PETS
4. AN UNPUBLISHED PHOTO OF A SKUNK DRESSED IN A LEATHER JACKET
5. AN UNPUBLISHED PHOTO OF A CAT LOOKING AT A PHOTO OF A SKUNK DRESSED IN A LEATHER JACKET
(All of these photos are courtesy Ms. Lynnda Butler, and thanks are given to her as well as her affiliate organization SKUNKS AS PETS
You may also note that THIS WEBSITE is a REPOSITORY for all prior unsolicited electro-mails on this subject, if that is of any use to you.
At some point you will be able to subscribe to this archive, such that these ELECTRO-MAILS will become absolutely OBSOLETE. Oh glorious day.
UPDATE! Apparently this helps with the subscribing: http://areasofmyexpertise.blogspot.com/atom.xml
But for now, you can only subscribe to the OBSCURE PHOTO STREAM
However, you will also note that the famed and very rare electro-mail “#1 OF 20” is not archived here, and is currently only available from collectors, who sell copies of that mailing in little mylar bags at the saddest flea market in the world.
AND ELSEWHERE ON THE INTERNET Jonathan Coulton is looking for a guitar solo: www.jonathancoulton.com
PART THREE: A GENTLE REMINDER
If there are citizens of the world who do not know this information already, I send it again:
LITTLE GRAY BOOK LECTURE NO 32: “How to Prepare Manuscripts for Publication
SHALL OCCUR next Wednesday at 8PM at Galapagos…
(70 N. 6th Street, between Kent and Wythe, in Williamsburg, Brooklyn)
A $5 donation shall be requested at the door by POTTS, if he is back from China.
MEANWHILE, AS YOU WAIT, perhaps you will consider “THE PETERSONS” concert at Caroline’s at 9PM tonight?
PART FOUR: THAT IS ALL
This special UNSOLICITED ELECTRO-MAIL shall constitute the entirety of update #8 of 20 regarding THE AREAS OF MY EXPERTISE,
…a book to be published by Dutton on October 24, 2005, and which shall be for sale via bookstores and computer networks October 20, 2005.
As always QUESTIONS COMMENTS AND CONCERNS on this or any subject may be posed to Hodgman@littlegraybooks.com.
YOU MAY ALSO WRITE VIA “MAIL BOX”: PO Box 1618, Cathedral Station, New York City, NY 10025
If you wish to be removed from this mailing list, simply respond to this address and include the word “PLEASE NO MORE!” in your reply.
The final mailing on this subject will be made January 2, 2006.
THAT IS ALL.