Friday, June 30, 2006


Originally uploaded by hodg-man.
Herewith an important document pertaining to hobo-related art--another happy remote connection made via this effort, which I had nothing to do with and, which, therefore, is all the more amazing to me.

Writes, Sally Brock, of the gallery:

"I found this artist from the 700 hoboes show based on your recording- (via contacted her and gave her a show:

On display through July at Fancy + Pants
Rachel Schafer
of San Francisco

Her newest series of paintings feature hobos and their sad little daughters [sad b/c daddy is a hobo] caught up in various tear-jerking scenarios -like gaining weight, sitting by the phone, looking forlornly at be-daddied pairs at the amusement park, etc. Inspired by the John Hodgman recording of 700 Hobo Names

Opening reception Saturday July 8, 7-9 p.m. Hobo style refreshments will be served"

Apparently, you can also buy underpants at this very gallery, or near it.

Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Some quick answers from the comments section

Randal Cooper said...

Will you also be answering age-old questions (five is an age, I think) about the death of the courtroom thriller?

Jh: Yes. I will be answering age-old questions. The first one I answer is below.

4:54 PM
Shrubs said...
Dear Mr. Hodgman,

I have recently decided that I may or may not take into consideration the possible career choice of unemployment. During this career, I may also choose to become homeless. During that time, I will host sock puppet shows, and take tips from people who pass by, so I can afford larger paper bags and socks for my shows.

I have everything planned out, but I do need one thing... A stage name.

Do you have any suggestions?

Jh: If you are trying to get me to say that my next book will contain 700 Homeless Sock Puppeteer Names, then you are foiled again, "Shrubs." I will never say it, because it is not true. My next book will feature 700 Mole Man Names.

5:51 PM
Annje said...

I'd like to know the answer to the age old question "If love is blind, deaf, mute, insane, stupid, and lame. What does it look like?" I'd like to know so I can turn and run the other way.
6:29 PM

Jh: At last, an age-old question. If you have ever seen the movie "Audition" by Takashi Miike, then you will know what I mean when I say that love is rolling around grunting in burlap sack in your apartment. And actually, it turns out I can't go out tonight after all.

If you have not seen the movie "Audition," don't now go out and watch it and then blame me after. It is a good movie, but it is no "Sound of Music." Let's just say that the grunting burlap sack quotient is very very high.

Monday, June 26, 2006

The Snap Beans Aren't Salty

When I agreed to let McSwys drag out the dusty old internet afterimages of my advice column ASK A FORMER PROFESSIONAL LITERARY AGENT from their forgiving archives, I was of course flattered and very happy.

It did not occur to me that of course it might naturally spark a round of new questions that you will want the answered.

And so I promise, Jason S. Blumberg (and a few others), I WILL answer your questions, but only as I have always done: slowly, inaccurately, and slowly.

Check back here in the future for answers (or links to same) or only to test your patience.

That is all.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

The Often Mediocre Work of Ken Plume

I normally don't repeat a press release verbatim, but I have Ken Plume on the phone, and this is what he has to say about his new internet venture:

"The regrettable and rather lackluster internet efforts of Ken Plume may now be found once more at QUICKSTOP ENTERTAINMENT. You may recall the often mediocre work of Mr. Plume from such ventures as and his important contributions to the historiography of the Muppets, and he will also be appearing as Henchman #20 in the forthcoming season of THE VENTURE BROTHERS, premiering this Sunday. He is told he sounds like Jeff Goldblum." END COPY.

You should check out Plume's interviews with Terry Gilliam and other Americans who like or look like Muppets at this website, and supposedly he will finally air via podcast a conversation he had with the author of my book finally, finally.

That is all.

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

The Sound of Young America

Jesse Thorn, one of the finest interviewers I have heard on radio and to my ears the best new voice on public radio, had an amazing talk with my label-mate George Saunders on his radio program THE SOUND OF YOUNG AMERICA on 6-10-06. Luckily, I am always up to date on my postings. Go here for to hear an excerpt from the interview, and by all means subscribe to the show.

And to answer Jesse's blog call for a capellists, COULTON was not only an a capellist but a goddamned Whiffenpoof.

In other embarrassingly late news, Mr. Adam Mazmanian has been successfully photographed.

That is all.

Monday, June 12, 2006

"It is a short and not altogether unpleasant walk from the Chinatown"


I was reminded recently that I failed to mention Mazmanian's new reading series in our nation's capital.

I shall not make the error again.

Not only is Mazmanian a tall friend with good taste, but this well-received event is being held at the Warehouse Theater, where Mazmanian, David Rees, and Jonathan Coulton performed two of our most memorable reading/guitaring/overhead projecting programs of our lives, in no small part because the audience brought whiskey.

In the words of Mazmanian: "First I'm going to hang; then I'm going to chill." I urge you to do the same.


Mr. F.W. Thomas is allowing us one more thrilling evening of readings, artistic display and song before leaving for his summer vacations in parts unknown. The pleasure of your company is kindly requested at this, the last edition of the F.W. Thomas Performances until Sept. 18. Please come and soak in elevating proceedings as if it were your last night on earth, because in many ways, it will be.

Our event will again occur at the Warehouse Theater on Monday June 12 at 7:30PM. Admission is $3. The Warehouse Theater is located at 1017-1021 7th Street NW. It is a short and not altogether unpleasant walk from the Chinatown/Gallery Place Metro. Phone is 202 783 3933.

The June 12 event will feature:

• Andrew Beaujon, managing editor of the Washington City Paper and a former senior contributing writer for Spin will read from his new book, "Body Piercing Saved My Life."

• T.M. Lowery, cartoonist, artist and creator of the Skeleton Kids will present more hilarious items from his illustrated personal journal and offer advice to the spiritually flummoxed, lost and lovelorn.

• Adam Mazmanian, host of the FW Thomas Affairs, reading the short story, “The Boomer Problem.”

• Josh McIlvain, a singer, author and songwriter living in New York City, where he performs his own compositions under the mysterious and alluring name of Sex Cop.

•Matthew Summers-Sparks humorist and short story writer whose work has been published in The New York Times, Mississippi Review, and McSweeney’s, reading stories.

The F.W. Thomas Performances will be hosted and introduced by yours truly, Adam Mazmanian, a writer living in D.C., a contributor to the Washington City Paper, and the un-credited inventor of the “rule of three.”

The series is named for F.W. Thomas (1811-1866), the attorney, novelist, satirist, polemicist, poet, journalist, government employee and a dear personal friend of Edgar Allan Poe.

For more information on Mr. Thomas please visit: this website

For more information on the Warehouse Theater, please visit: this other website


That is all