IN A PREVIOUS COMMENTS THREAD,
bec_87rb asked... WHAT DOES JOHN HODGMAN HAVE TO SAY ABOUT THIS...
As you know, the invasion is on and there's no point denying it. If someone at work has been acting strangely lately (ie, keeping conversations brief and polite; avoiding eye contact; asking you to 'please go away'), chances are he/she has already been replaced by a pod person, and you should watch them carefully, and angrily, whenever they cannot see you.
But if it's a loved one, the situation can be more complex. Many do not wish to admit that their spouse is a pod person. That is why I recommend creating a pre-nuptial questionnaire--a list of very personal questions that only your true spouse knows the answer to. You can imagine the sort:
What side of the bed do you sleep on?
Where do you keep your toothbrush?
Why do you keep it there and not put it in the safe like I suggested?
Don't you think our personal items should be protected by a fireproof safe?
That sort of thing.
I'd recommend that the questionnaire include about 1,000 of these questions. Then simply go through the questions each morning and, for added security, over cocktails at night as well. Make a game of it.
Of course, if your spouse was already a pod person when you got married, you are out of luck. Enjoy your new lifestyle of subservience to alien whims and unsecure toothbrushes.
Also, the pod people disintegrate when doused with kerosene or grain alcohol. Try it!*
That is all.
JH
*No. Do not douse anyone with kerosene or grain alcohol.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
Friday, June 30, 2006
HOBO ART SHOW
Herewith an important document pertaining to hobo-related art--another happy remote connection made via this effort, which I had nothing to do with and, which, therefore, is all the more amazing to me.
Writes, Sally Brock, of the gallery:
"I found this artist from the 700 hoboes show based on your recording- (via boingboing.net) contacted her and gave her a show:
On display through July at Fancy + Pants
Rachel Schafer
of San Francisco
Her newest series of paintings feature hobos and their sad little daughters [sad b/c daddy is a hobo] caught up in various tear-jerking scenarios -like gaining weight, sitting by the phone, looking forlornly at be-daddied pairs at the amusement park, etc. Inspired by the John Hodgman recording of 700 Hobo Names
Opening reception Saturday July 8, 7-9 p.m. Hobo style refreshments will be served"
Apparently, you can also buy underpants at this very gallery, or near it.
Writes, Sally Brock, of the gallery:
"I found this artist from the 700 hoboes show based on your recording- (via boingboing.net) contacted her and gave her a show:
On display through July at Fancy + Pants
Rachel Schafer
of San Francisco
Her newest series of paintings feature hobos and their sad little daughters [sad b/c daddy is a hobo] caught up in various tear-jerking scenarios -like gaining weight, sitting by the phone, looking forlornly at be-daddied pairs at the amusement park, etc. Inspired by the John Hodgman recording of 700 Hobo Names
Opening reception Saturday July 8, 7-9 p.m. Hobo style refreshments will be served"
Apparently, you can also buy underpants at this very gallery, or near it.
Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Some quick answers from the comments section
Randal Cooper said...
Will you also be answering age-old questions (five is an age, I think) about the death of the courtroom thriller?
Jh: Yes. I will be answering age-old questions. The first one I answer is below.
4:54 PM
Shrubs said...
Dear Mr. Hodgman,
I have recently decided that I may or may not take into consideration the possible career choice of unemployment. During this career, I may also choose to become homeless. During that time, I will host sock puppet shows, and take tips from people who pass by, so I can afford larger paper bags and socks for my shows.
I have everything planned out, but I do need one thing... A stage name.
Do you have any suggestions?
Jh: If you are trying to get me to say that my next book will contain 700 Homeless Sock Puppeteer Names, then you are foiled again, "Shrubs." I will never say it, because it is not true. My next book will feature 700 Mole Man Names.
5:51 PM
Annje said...
I'd like to know the answer to the age old question "If love is blind, deaf, mute, insane, stupid, and lame. What does it look like?" I'd like to know so I can turn and run the other way.
6:29 PM
Jh: At last, an age-old question. If you have ever seen the movie "Audition" by Takashi Miike, then you will know what I mean when I say that love is rolling around grunting in burlap sack in your apartment. And actually, it turns out I can't go out tonight after all.
If you have not seen the movie "Audition," don't now go out and watch it and then blame me after. It is a good movie, but it is no "Sound of Music." Let's just say that the grunting burlap sack quotient is very very high.
Will you also be answering age-old questions (five is an age, I think) about the death of the courtroom thriller?
Jh: Yes. I will be answering age-old questions. The first one I answer is below.
4:54 PM
Shrubs said...
Dear Mr. Hodgman,
I have recently decided that I may or may not take into consideration the possible career choice of unemployment. During this career, I may also choose to become homeless. During that time, I will host sock puppet shows, and take tips from people who pass by, so I can afford larger paper bags and socks for my shows.
I have everything planned out, but I do need one thing... A stage name.
Do you have any suggestions?
Jh: If you are trying to get me to say that my next book will contain 700 Homeless Sock Puppeteer Names, then you are foiled again, "Shrubs." I will never say it, because it is not true. My next book will feature 700 Mole Man Names.
5:51 PM
Annje said...
I'd like to know the answer to the age old question "If love is blind, deaf, mute, insane, stupid, and lame. What does it look like?" I'd like to know so I can turn and run the other way.
6:29 PM
Jh: At last, an age-old question. If you have ever seen the movie "Audition" by Takashi Miike, then you will know what I mean when I say that love is rolling around grunting in burlap sack in your apartment. And actually, it turns out I can't go out tonight after all.
If you have not seen the movie "Audition," don't now go out and watch it and then blame me after. It is a good movie, but it is no "Sound of Music." Let's just say that the grunting burlap sack quotient is very very high.
Monday, June 26, 2006
The Snap Beans Aren't Salty
When I agreed to let McSwys drag out the dusty old internet afterimages of my advice column ASK A FORMER PROFESSIONAL LITERARY AGENT from their forgiving archives, I was of course flattered and very happy.
It did not occur to me that of course it might naturally spark a round of new questions that you will want the answered.
And so I promise, Jason S. Blumberg (and a few others), I WILL answer your questions, but only as I have always done: slowly, inaccurately, and slowly.
Check back here in the future for answers (or links to same) or only to test your patience.
That is all.
It did not occur to me that of course it might naturally spark a round of new questions that you will want the answered.
And so I promise, Jason S. Blumberg (and a few others), I WILL answer your questions, but only as I have always done: slowly, inaccurately, and slowly.
Check back here in the future for answers (or links to same) or only to test your patience.
That is all.
Thursday, June 22, 2006
The Often Mediocre Work of Ken Plume
I normally don't repeat a press release verbatim, but I have Ken Plume on the phone, and this is what he has to say about his new internet venture:
"The regrettable and rather lackluster internet efforts of Ken Plume may now be found once more at QUICKSTOP ENTERTAINMENT. You may recall the often mediocre work of Mr. Plume from such ventures as IGN.com and his important contributions to the historiography of the Muppets, and he will also be appearing as Henchman #20 in the forthcoming season of THE VENTURE BROTHERS, premiering this Sunday. He is told he sounds like Jeff Goldblum." END COPY.
You should check out Plume's interviews with Terry Gilliam and other Americans who like or look like Muppets at this website, and supposedly he will finally air via podcast a conversation he had with the author of my book finally, finally.
That is all.
"The regrettable and rather lackluster internet efforts of Ken Plume may now be found once more at QUICKSTOP ENTERTAINMENT. You may recall the often mediocre work of Mr. Plume from such ventures as IGN.com and his important contributions to the historiography of the Muppets, and he will also be appearing as Henchman #20 in the forthcoming season of THE VENTURE BROTHERS, premiering this Sunday. He is told he sounds like Jeff Goldblum." END COPY.
You should check out Plume's interviews with Terry Gilliam and other Americans who like or look like Muppets at this website, and supposedly he will finally air via podcast a conversation he had with the author of my book finally, finally.
That is all.
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
The Sound of Young America
Jesse Thorn, one of the finest interviewers I have heard on radio and to my ears the best new voice on public radio, had an amazing talk with my label-mate George Saunders on his radio program THE SOUND OF YOUNG AMERICA on 6-10-06. Luckily, I am always up to date on my postings. Go here for to hear an excerpt from the interview, and by all means subscribe to the show.
And to answer Jesse's blog call for a capellists, COULTON was not only an a capellist but a goddamned Whiffenpoof.
In other embarrassingly late news, Mr. Adam Mazmanian has been successfully photographed.
That is all.
And to answer Jesse's blog call for a capellists, COULTON was not only an a capellist but a goddamned Whiffenpoof.
In other embarrassingly late news, Mr. Adam Mazmanian has been successfully photographed.
That is all.
Monday, June 12, 2006
"It is a short and not altogether unpleasant walk from the Chinatown"
Hello.
I was reminded recently that I failed to mention Mazmanian's new reading series in our nation's capital.
I shall not make the error again.
Not only is Mazmanian a tall friend with good taste, but this well-received event is being held at the Warehouse Theater, where Mazmanian, David Rees, and Jonathan Coulton performed two of our most memorable reading/guitaring/overhead projecting programs of our lives, in no small part because the audience brought whiskey.
In the words of Mazmanian: "First I'm going to hang; then I'm going to chill." I urge you to do the same.
QUOTED TEXT FOLLOWS:
Mr. F.W. Thomas is allowing us one more thrilling evening of readings, artistic display and song before leaving for his summer vacations in parts unknown. The pleasure of your company is kindly requested at this, the last edition of the F.W. Thomas Performances until Sept. 18. Please come and soak in elevating proceedings as if it were your last night on earth, because in many ways, it will be.
Our event will again occur at the Warehouse Theater on Monday June 12 at 7:30PM. Admission is $3. The Warehouse Theater is located at 1017-1021 7th Street NW. It is a short and not altogether unpleasant walk from the Chinatown/Gallery Place Metro. Phone is 202 783 3933.
The June 12 event will feature:
• Andrew Beaujon, managing editor of the Washington City Paper and a former senior contributing writer for Spin will read from his new book, "Body Piercing Saved My Life."
• T.M. Lowery, cartoonist, artist and creator of the Skeleton Kids will present more hilarious items from his illustrated personal journal and offer advice to the spiritually flummoxed, lost and lovelorn.
• Adam Mazmanian, host of the FW Thomas Affairs, reading the short story, “The Boomer Problem.”
• Josh McIlvain, a singer, author and songwriter living in New York City, where he performs his own compositions under the mysterious and alluring name of Sex Cop.
•Matthew Summers-Sparks humorist and short story writer whose work has been published in The New York Times, Mississippi Review, and McSweeney’s, reading stories.
The F.W. Thomas Performances will be hosted and introduced by yours truly, Adam Mazmanian, a writer living in D.C., a contributor to the Washington City Paper, and the un-credited inventor of the “rule of three.”
The series is named for F.W. Thomas (1811-1866), the attorney, novelist, satirist, polemicist, poet, journalist, government employee and a dear personal friend of Edgar Allan Poe.
For more information on Mr. Thomas please visit: this website
For more information on the Warehouse Theater, please visit: this other website
QUOTED TEXT ENDS
That is all
I was reminded recently that I failed to mention Mazmanian's new reading series in our nation's capital.
I shall not make the error again.
Not only is Mazmanian a tall friend with good taste, but this well-received event is being held at the Warehouse Theater, where Mazmanian, David Rees, and Jonathan Coulton performed two of our most memorable reading/guitaring/overhead projecting programs of our lives, in no small part because the audience brought whiskey.
In the words of Mazmanian: "First I'm going to hang; then I'm going to chill." I urge you to do the same.
QUOTED TEXT FOLLOWS:
Mr. F.W. Thomas is allowing us one more thrilling evening of readings, artistic display and song before leaving for his summer vacations in parts unknown. The pleasure of your company is kindly requested at this, the last edition of the F.W. Thomas Performances until Sept. 18. Please come and soak in elevating proceedings as if it were your last night on earth, because in many ways, it will be.
Our event will again occur at the Warehouse Theater on Monday June 12 at 7:30PM. Admission is $3. The Warehouse Theater is located at 1017-1021 7th Street NW. It is a short and not altogether unpleasant walk from the Chinatown/Gallery Place Metro. Phone is 202 783 3933.
The June 12 event will feature:
• Andrew Beaujon, managing editor of the Washington City Paper and a former senior contributing writer for Spin will read from his new book, "Body Piercing Saved My Life."
• T.M. Lowery, cartoonist, artist and creator of the Skeleton Kids will present more hilarious items from his illustrated personal journal and offer advice to the spiritually flummoxed, lost and lovelorn.
• Adam Mazmanian, host of the FW Thomas Affairs, reading the short story, “The Boomer Problem.”
• Josh McIlvain, a singer, author and songwriter living in New York City, where he performs his own compositions under the mysterious and alluring name of Sex Cop.
•Matthew Summers-Sparks humorist and short story writer whose work has been published in The New York Times, Mississippi Review, and McSweeney’s, reading stories.
The F.W. Thomas Performances will be hosted and introduced by yours truly, Adam Mazmanian, a writer living in D.C., a contributor to the Washington City Paper, and the un-credited inventor of the “rule of three.”
The series is named for F.W. Thomas (1811-1866), the attorney, novelist, satirist, polemicist, poet, journalist, government employee and a dear personal friend of Edgar Allan Poe.
For more information on Mr. Thomas please visit: this website
For more information on the Warehouse Theater, please visit: this other website
QUOTED TEXT ENDS
That is all
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Thank you, and please note
I'm grateful, very grateful, for the nice comments in the "comments" area below.
But Rob Kemp, who rocks (see below), pointed out to me that the previous post may have seemed like an angry cry for help.
Allow me to clarify. I was merely trying to make a joke at my own expense and stabilize karma levels by linking to the least flattering blog mentions of me that I could find.
While it's a very kind impulse, you should not feel the need to defend me or otherwise combat unflattery. I am prepared for and encourage unflattery.
Instead, consider this:
I QUOTE:
Howdy folks.
Just a reminder that this coming Tuesday, May 16, the Original Punk/Metal Karaoke band will be playing its first show since February at Lit Lounge, 93 Second Ave, between 5th and 6th streets in Manhattan, at 9:45pm. The cover is $5.
But beforehand, the band is playing a private party this Thursday May 11 at the Slipper Room, 167 Orchard (on the corner of Orchard and Stanton). The general public is invited: the cover is $20.
We will have 6 new songs to add to our repertoire:
Dio, "Holy Diver"
Joy Division, "Transmission"
Ozzy Osbourne, "Flying High Again"
Velvet Underground, "White Light/White Heat"
Weezer, "Buddy Holly"
Winger, "Seventeen"
Additionally, in partnership with Addvice Marketing, we will give certain CDs from newer punky and metal-esque bands to particularly good (or merely memorable) singers. The BellRays Have a Little Faith will go to a lad or lassie doing an exceptional rendition of an MC5 or Stooges tune, and Wolfmother's self-titled debut will be awarded for an exemplary performance of a Sabbath or Deep Purple song. And an Envelopes album will be going to the best performance of a Buzzcocks or VU tune.
Thanks a lot. We hope to see you there.
The Punk Rock/Heavy Metal Karaoke band
END QUOTE
That is all.
But Rob Kemp, who rocks (see below), pointed out to me that the previous post may have seemed like an angry cry for help.
Allow me to clarify. I was merely trying to make a joke at my own expense and stabilize karma levels by linking to the least flattering blog mentions of me that I could find.
While it's a very kind impulse, you should not feel the need to defend me or otherwise combat unflattery. I am prepared for and encourage unflattery.
Instead, consider this:
I QUOTE:
Howdy folks.
Just a reminder that this coming Tuesday, May 16, the Original Punk/Metal Karaoke band will be playing its first show since February at Lit Lounge, 93 Second Ave, between 5th and 6th streets in Manhattan, at 9:45pm. The cover is $5.
But beforehand, the band is playing a private party this Thursday May 11 at the Slipper Room, 167 Orchard (on the corner of Orchard and Stanton). The general public is invited: the cover is $20.
We will have 6 new songs to add to our repertoire:
Dio, "Holy Diver"
Joy Division, "Transmission"
Ozzy Osbourne, "Flying High Again"
Velvet Underground, "White Light/White Heat"
Weezer, "Buddy Holly"
Winger, "Seventeen"
Additionally, in partnership with Addvice Marketing, we will give certain CDs from newer punky and metal-esque bands to particularly good (or merely memorable) singers. The BellRays Have a Little Faith will go to a lad or lassie doing an exceptional rendition of an MC5 or Stooges tune, and Wolfmother's self-titled debut will be awarded for an exemplary performance of a Sabbath or Deep Purple song. And an Envelopes album will be going to the best performance of a Buzzcocks or VU tune.
Thanks a lot. We hope to see you there.
The Punk Rock/Heavy Metal Karaoke band
END QUOTE
That is all.
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
A Reply to Gawker
As posted on their comments board:
"I'm pretty astonished that it took Gawker, a site I normally admire, quite this long to report this non-news.
As you can see, many blogs reported on my weight and out-selling long before May 9. From now on, I will be checking these fine sites for all the Hodgman anti-news as it breaks:
here
and
here
At least you will never be as slow as this site:
see here
Meanwhile, I remain, affectionately:
Jh
That is all.
"I'm pretty astonished that it took Gawker, a site I normally admire, quite this long to report this non-news.
As you can see, many blogs reported on my weight and out-selling long before May 9. From now on, I will be checking these fine sites for all the Hodgman anti-news as it breaks:
here
and
here
At least you will never be as slow as this site:
see here
Meanwhile, I remain, affectionately:
Jh
That is all.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
I AM CORRECTED
Thanks to the internets marvelous "self-correcting" feature, I realize now that I meant to write:
www.mopitkins.com and not MOTpitkins.com, which is meaningless.
I hope some of you made it to the Coulton show in any case, because I, alas, was home in bed suffering from angry throat-ache, and I would desire to hear reports of the night... "set lists," "banter," "surprise guests," etc.
Also, I would be willing to purchase a BOOTLEG RECORDING of the evening as well.
I would also be willing to purchase a BOOTLEG RECORDING of the chopped liver.
....
Meanwhile, yes: I am in the television ad that you are seeing. It was a lot of fun to do, though it was very hard shooting on the polar ice caps.
That is all.
www.mopitkins.com and not MOTpitkins.com, which is meaningless.
I hope some of you made it to the Coulton show in any case, because I, alas, was home in bed suffering from angry throat-ache, and I would desire to hear reports of the night... "set lists," "banter," "surprise guests," etc.
Also, I would be willing to purchase a BOOTLEG RECORDING of the evening as well.
I would also be willing to purchase a BOOTLEG RECORDING of the chopped liver.
....
Meanwhile, yes: I am in the television ad that you are seeing. It was a lot of fun to do, though it was very hard shooting on the polar ice caps.
That is all.
Monday, May 01, 2006
Only COULTON can wake me from my month long slumber
I wanted to let you Coulton fans know that Coulton is offering a VERY SPECIAL concert of songs themed to the first of May (and other themes) on May 1, this Monday, at 7PM, at "Mo Pitkin's" THE place to go for bawdy calendar-based songs and also: chopped liver.
34 Avenue A, upstairs, and FREE.
He has many many more songs than you've heard before, as he has been writing one per week for the past 1000 years--part of his incredible "Thing A Week" podcast via his website, called, not surprisingly jonathancoulton.com
34 Avenue A, upstairs, and FREE.
He has many many more songs than you've heard before, as he has been writing one per week for the past 1000 years--part of his incredible "Thing A Week" podcast via his website, called, not surprisingly jonathancoulton.com
Friday, March 31, 2006
The text of an e-mail I just received
"WERE YOU AWARE OF IT?
"You, John Hodgman (assuming this is you I'm writing to) have a fanclub. Based on the popular "website" LiveJournal, it consists of 20 or so fans who discuss all matters Hodgman. It could be found (again, assuming that you are John Hodgman and you are currently connected to the Internet) at http://community.livejournal.com/john_hodgfans
"DOES IT EVEN SEEM POSSIBLE?
--
"Yours digitally,
Lucas J. Wagner, Esq."
For the five of you who make take interest in such things, I provide this information.
That is all.
"You, John Hodgman (assuming this is you I'm writing to) have a fanclub. Based on the popular "website" LiveJournal, it consists of 20 or so fans who discuss all matters Hodgman. It could be found (again, assuming that you are John Hodgman and you are currently connected to the Internet) at http://community.livejournal.com/john_hodgfans
"DOES IT EVEN SEEM POSSIBLE?
--
"Yours digitally,
Lucas J. Wagner, Esq."
For the five of you who make take interest in such things, I provide this information.
That is all.
Sunday, March 19, 2006
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
"Yeti Crab"
They call it the yeti crab.
I call it astonishing and strange.
Thanks to everyone who pointed out the discovery of the "furry lobster"--it has been a revelation to me, and a challenge for my spam filter.
That is all.
I call it astonishing and strange.
Thanks to everyone who pointed out the discovery of the "furry lobster"--it has been a revelation to me, and a challenge for my spam filter.
That is all.
Friday, March 03, 2006
Some items you should keep in mind for March
JON LANGFORD (w. Ship & Pilot) - GOLD BRICK CD RELEASE PARTY
(R.O.I.R. presents Jon Langford's 3rd solo CD GOLD BRICK)
Wed. March 8th @ 10pm
The Bowery Poetry Club
308 Bowery @ Bleecker, right across from CBGB's
F train to Second Ave | 6 train to Bleecker | 212-614-0505
JON LANGFORD (w. Ship & Pilot) - NASHVILLE RADIO BOOK LAUNCH
Jon will be reading from and signing his new book NASHVILLE RADIO:
Art, words, music (Verse Chorus Press) PLUS a set of tunes from
GOLD BRICK and The Nashville Radio Companion Earwig
Thurs. March 9th @ 8pm
Galapagos
70 North 6th Street
between Kent and Wythe
Williamsburg, Brooklyn, NY 11211
718 782-5188
JONATHAN COULTON
Sunday March 19: Full-On Acoustic Show ($12)
7pm at Mo Pitkin's in NYC (with Paul and Storm)
(R.O.I.R. presents Jon Langford's 3rd solo CD GOLD BRICK)
Wed. March 8th @ 10pm
The Bowery Poetry Club
308 Bowery @ Bleecker, right across from CBGB's
F train to Second Ave | 6 train to Bleecker | 212-614-0505
JON LANGFORD (w. Ship & Pilot) - NASHVILLE RADIO BOOK LAUNCH
Jon will be reading from and signing his new book NASHVILLE RADIO:
Art, words, music (Verse Chorus Press) PLUS a set of tunes from
GOLD BRICK and The Nashville Radio Companion Earwig
Thurs. March 9th @ 8pm
Galapagos
70 North 6th Street
between Kent and Wythe
Williamsburg, Brooklyn, NY 11211
718 782-5188
JONATHAN COULTON
Sunday March 19: Full-On Acoustic Show ($12)
7pm at Mo Pitkin's in NYC (with Paul and Storm)
Sunday, February 26, 2006
Greetings, people who post on blogs updated with embarrassing infrequency.
Greetings, people who post on blogs updated with embarrassing infrequency.
To answer the question of R. Lord, we have no current plans to visit Texas, though perhaps when the paperback comes out this fall.
To answer the question of PBJar, Coulton and I and also David Rees will be appearing at Tisdale and Mirman's very fine show "Invite Them Up!"
Unless I have misremembered something, or there has been a sudden change of plans, this will happen at 8:30PM, on March 1, at:
RiFiFi (Cinema Classics)
332 E. 11th Street (BTW 1st & 2nd Ave.), NYC
Doors @ 8:30 PM, $5
- This show is 21+
Even if there has been a sudden change of plan, you will still enjoy this show, so by all means: ATTEND.
Finally, I am my own unpaid intern, and require no further help at this time. Though I thank you, as always.
THAT IS ALL.
Now I will actually post this message.
To answer the question of R. Lord, we have no current plans to visit Texas, though perhaps when the paperback comes out this fall.
To answer the question of PBJar, Coulton and I and also David Rees will be appearing at Tisdale and Mirman's very fine show "Invite Them Up!"
Unless I have misremembered something, or there has been a sudden change of plans, this will happen at 8:30PM, on March 1, at:
RiFiFi (Cinema Classics)
332 E. 11th Street (BTW 1st & 2nd Ave.), NYC
Doors @ 8:30 PM, $5
- This show is 21+
Even if there has been a sudden change of plan, you will still enjoy this show, so by all means: ATTEND.
Finally, I am my own unpaid intern, and require no further help at this time. Though I thank you, as always.
THAT IS ALL.
Now I will actually post this message.
Friday, February 17, 2006
This evening at THE TATTERED COVER
Greetings.
This is John Hodgman writing.
I regret very much that we could not be in Milwaukee last night as we had planned.
As noted, it was recommended that we not attempt to fly into this fine city due to heavy snow and giant, marauding eagles.
Yet we wish to return, and soon, to make it up to the people of Wisconsin.
Meanwhile, tonight we shall be at the Tattered Cover in Denver, CO, a very cold city that also has snow, but where the giant eagle problem is not as severe.
If you know any Coloradans who may be interested in this information, I'd be delighted to shake their hands.
FRIDAY, FEB 17 at
THE TATTERED COVER (CHERRY CREEK)
2955 East First Avenue at Milwaukee Street in Cherry Creek North, directly across the street from the Cherry Creek Mall.
Denver, CO
303-322-7727
7:30PM
FREE OF CHARGE
That is all.
This is John Hodgman writing.
I regret very much that we could not be in Milwaukee last night as we had planned.
As noted, it was recommended that we not attempt to fly into this fine city due to heavy snow and giant, marauding eagles.
Yet we wish to return, and soon, to make it up to the people of Wisconsin.
Meanwhile, tonight we shall be at the Tattered Cover in Denver, CO, a very cold city that also has snow, but where the giant eagle problem is not as severe.
If you know any Coloradans who may be interested in this information, I'd be delighted to shake their hands.
FRIDAY, FEB 17 at
THE TATTERED COVER (CHERRY CREEK)
2955 East First Avenue at Milwaukee Street in Cherry Creek North, directly across the street from the Cherry Creek Mall.
Denver, CO
303-322-7727
7:30PM
FREE OF CHARGE
That is all.
Thursday, February 16, 2006
The American West, MINUS MILWAUKEE
I am very sad to report that, due to inclement weather, our appearance at Schwartz Books in Milwaukee has been canceled for tonight.
If you were planning to brave the sleet and ice and snow and raining snakes of fire, I would advise you to stay home beneath your snake-proof roof. I hope we will be able to reschedule soon.
Meanwhile, please visit this fine establishment, if only virtually, as they are very kind.
We now fly on to Denver.
That is all.
If you were planning to brave the sleet and ice and snow and raining snakes of fire, I would advise you to stay home beneath your snake-proof roof. I hope we will be able to reschedule soon.
Meanwhile, please visit this fine establishment, if only virtually, as they are very kind.
We now fly on to Denver.
That is all.
Monday, February 13, 2006
BOOK SOUP TONIGHT and CURLING
I am asked to remind you fine people of two things.
1. HODGMAN and COULTON, that old duo of Broadway, will be appearing this evening, Feb 13, at Book Soup in Los Anegeles.
This will occur at 7PM Pacific Time
8818 Sunset Blvd.
W. Hollywood CA 90069
Store Hours (West Hollywood)
The subject will be: HOBOES
2. COULTON has written about the great winter sport of CURLING
That is all.
1. HODGMAN and COULTON, that old duo of Broadway, will be appearing this evening, Feb 13, at Book Soup in Los Anegeles.
This will occur at 7PM Pacific Time
8818 Sunset Blvd.
W. Hollywood CA 90069
Store Hours (West Hollywood)
The subject will be: HOBOES
2. COULTON has written about the great winter sport of CURLING
That is all.
Tuesday, February 07, 2006
THE AMERICAN WEST, PLUS MILWAUKEE
Good evening.
This is John Hodgman writing with information pertaining to...
A FORTHCOMING MINI-TOUR OF THE AMERICAN WEST, PLUS MILWAUKEE, IN SUPPORT OF "THE AREAS OF MY EXPERTISE," a book of fake trivia.
AS PREVIOUSLY NOTED, John Hodgman and JONATHAN COULTON will be visiting 5 American cities in the coming week and a half. In chronological order, they are:
1. CORTE MADERA, CA: Thanks to their surprising kindness, especially in light of what I said about them here, the BAY AREANS are welcoming us back on...
FRIDAY, FEB 10, to
BOOK PASSAGE
51 Tamal Vista Blvd.
Corte Madera, CA 94925
(415) 927-0960
7PM
FREE OF CHARGE
2. LOS ANGELES, CA: In the first of two Los Angeles appearances, we shall join our friend from the mid-Atlantean mini tour MR. DAVID REES for a fascinating evening of expertise in conjunction with McSweeney's and 826LA entitled THE WORLD EXPLAINED. Not only will Mr. Rees be presenting his unstoppable overhead projections, but also we will join the estimable...
MIKE COLTON (spelled without a "U")
ELI HOROWITZ (also without a "U")
The staff of "YETI RESEARCHER," a periodical
JON BRION, presenting music
and our host
PATTON OSWALT
This will all occur on...
SATURDAY, FEB 11 at
The Roy and Edna Disney/CalArts Theater
aka: R.E.D.C.A.T.!
631 West 2nd Street
Los Angeles, CA 90012
213-237-2800
8:30 PM
10 dollars, discounts for CalArts students, alumni, faculty, and staff
FOR TICKETS, SEE HERE.
3. LOS ANGELES, CA: In this second appearance, Jonathan Coulton and John Hodgman shall discuss "hoboes" with the patrons of a famous independent bookstore on...
MONDAY, FEB 13 at
BOOK SOUP
8818 Sunset Blvd.
W. Hollywood CA 90069
310-659-311
7PM
FREE OF CHARGE
4. PORTLAND, OR: Coulton and Hodgman shall travel north to Portland (nickname, "THE PORTLAND, MAINE OF OREGON; EXCEPT THAT INSTEAD OF LOBSTERS, THERE ARE BEAVERS") on...
WEDNESDAY, Feb 15 at
POWELL'S CITY OF BOOKS (BURNSIDE)
1005 W Burnside
Portland, OR 97209
7:30PM
FREE OF CHARGE
5. MILWAUKEE, WI: we shall discuss either hoboes or lobsters in Milwaukee's notorious "BAY VIEW" district on...
THURSDAY, FEB 16 at
HARRY W. SCHWARTZ BOOKSHOP (BAY VIEW)
2262 S. Kinnickinnic Ave.
Milwaukee, WI 53207
(KK at Lincoln) (nb: SOME KIND OF CODE?!)
414-481-3401
7PM
FREE OF CHARGE
6. DENVER, CO: from Milwaukee State to Milwaukee Street (where it intersects with East First Avenue), we shall travel south and upwards to Colorado on...
FRIDAY, FEB 17 at
THE TATTERED COVER (CHERRY CREEK)
2955 East First Avenue at Milwaukee Street in Cherry Creek North, directly across the street from the Cherry Creek Mall.
Denver, CO
303-322-7727
7:30PM
FREE OF CHARGE
THEREAFTER: a small amount of rest.
If you do not wish to receive this or future electronic mailings, please reply and include the words "stop it" in the subject line."
If this has been forwarded to you, or you are reading it on the internet, and wish to receive such mailings in the future, as well as information about THE LITTLE GRAY BOOK LECTURES and other subjects, please simply write hodgman@littlegraybooks.com and include the words "MORE INFORMATION THAN I REQUIRE" in the subject line.
Until then, all I can say is thank you, and...
THAT IS ALL.
This is John Hodgman writing with information pertaining to...
A FORTHCOMING MINI-TOUR OF THE AMERICAN WEST, PLUS MILWAUKEE, IN SUPPORT OF "THE AREAS OF MY EXPERTISE," a book of fake trivia.
AS PREVIOUSLY NOTED, John Hodgman and JONATHAN COULTON will be visiting 5 American cities in the coming week and a half. In chronological order, they are:
1. CORTE MADERA, CA: Thanks to their surprising kindness, especially in light of what I said about them here, the BAY AREANS are welcoming us back on...
FRIDAY, FEB 10, to
BOOK PASSAGE
51 Tamal Vista Blvd.
Corte Madera, CA 94925
(415) 927-0960
7PM
FREE OF CHARGE
2. LOS ANGELES, CA: In the first of two Los Angeles appearances, we shall join our friend from the mid-Atlantean mini tour MR. DAVID REES for a fascinating evening of expertise in conjunction with McSweeney's and 826LA entitled THE WORLD EXPLAINED. Not only will Mr. Rees be presenting his unstoppable overhead projections, but also we will join the estimable...
MIKE COLTON (spelled without a "U")
ELI HOROWITZ (also without a "U")
The staff of "YETI RESEARCHER," a periodical
JON BRION, presenting music
and our host
PATTON OSWALT
This will all occur on...
SATURDAY, FEB 11 at
The Roy and Edna Disney/CalArts Theater
aka: R.E.D.C.A.T.!
631 West 2nd Street
Los Angeles, CA 90012
213-237-2800
8:30 PM
10 dollars, discounts for CalArts students, alumni, faculty, and staff
FOR TICKETS, SEE HERE.
3. LOS ANGELES, CA: In this second appearance, Jonathan Coulton and John Hodgman shall discuss "hoboes" with the patrons of a famous independent bookstore on...
MONDAY, FEB 13 at
BOOK SOUP
8818 Sunset Blvd.
W. Hollywood CA 90069
310-659-311
7PM
FREE OF CHARGE
4. PORTLAND, OR: Coulton and Hodgman shall travel north to Portland (nickname, "THE PORTLAND, MAINE OF OREGON; EXCEPT THAT INSTEAD OF LOBSTERS, THERE ARE BEAVERS") on...
WEDNESDAY, Feb 15 at
POWELL'S CITY OF BOOKS (BURNSIDE)
1005 W Burnside
Portland, OR 97209
7:30PM
FREE OF CHARGE
5. MILWAUKEE, WI: we shall discuss either hoboes or lobsters in Milwaukee's notorious "BAY VIEW" district on...
THURSDAY, FEB 16 at
HARRY W. SCHWARTZ BOOKSHOP (BAY VIEW)
2262 S. Kinnickinnic Ave.
Milwaukee, WI 53207
(KK at Lincoln) (nb: SOME KIND OF CODE?!)
414-481-3401
7PM
FREE OF CHARGE
6. DENVER, CO: from Milwaukee State to Milwaukee Street (where it intersects with East First Avenue), we shall travel south and upwards to Colorado on...
FRIDAY, FEB 17 at
THE TATTERED COVER (CHERRY CREEK)
2955 East First Avenue at Milwaukee Street in Cherry Creek North, directly across the street from the Cherry Creek Mall.
Denver, CO
303-322-7727
7:30PM
FREE OF CHARGE
THEREAFTER: a small amount of rest.
If you do not wish to receive this or future electronic mailings, please reply and include the words "stop it" in the subject line."
If this has been forwarded to you, or you are reading it on the internet, and wish to receive such mailings in the future, as well as information about THE LITTLE GRAY BOOK LECTURES and other subjects, please simply write hodgman@littlegraybooks.com and include the words "MORE INFORMATION THAN I REQUIRE" in the subject line.
Until then, all I can say is thank you, and...
THAT IS ALL.
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